when I was 12 or 13 I was so scared that I was gay. I didn’t want to be gay I didn’t want to be a lesbian. I didn’t want that word. It felt dirty. I wish I could go back and hold myself and tell myself that it will feel like coming home. That my body will finally feel like my own. That it will be cherished. That lesbian isn’t a dirty word. It’s freeing and it is my truth. I wish I could tell myself that it will be hard. It will be hard coming to terms with who I am and who my heart wants. That I will lose people that I thought were my friends. And family. That I will have to come out over and over and over and feel that fear of rejection over and over and over. Always. But it’s all worth it. It’s worth it to allow myself to feel love that feels true. It’s worth it to know myself and to love myself. I wish I could tell myself that I don’t have to be weighed down. I wish I could tell myself that being a lesbian means being free.
if you are a lesbian and this resonates with you, feel free to rb!
| Via: fishfingersandscarves |
